22. Long Time No See!

What’s that saying about ‘absence makes the heart grow fonder?’ I sincerely hope that’s true seeing as I’ve left you for quite some time! All I can do is apologise and assure you that my disappearing act wasn’t for lack of adventure or lifestyle action – it is in fact quite the contrary! I’ve been a very busy little hotwife which now leaves me in a bit of a quandary; what do I share with you first? Transatlantic lifestyle events? Sex club antics across Europe? Our first house-party escapades? Or should I stick to my old faithful one-on-one adventures?

Perhaps a good place to start would be with an update on Secret Vixen herself. Those of you who’ve kept up with me on social media will already have some idea of what I’ve been up to. However, ever since one particular platform changed hands, I’ve found myself posting there less and less. Which is exactly why I’ve returned home—to my blog.

When I first began sharing my experiences here it was born from a place of isolation. Simply put, I had no one (other than my stag of course!) to confide in. Whilst I consider myself to be fortunate in my wide circle of friends, ethical non-monogamy was not something that ever popped up in conversation and due to where I was in the stage of my life, so many of my nearest and dearest were still in the early stages of settling down with partners that they considered threesomes to be scandalous and an act of infidelity. How on earth could I then share that I had not only been involved in a MFM and an FMF encounter, but also in a Star Trek-themed orgy? – add that to the possible future chapters. Therefore, I turned to my keyboard and so this blog came to be.

Fast forward 8 years – good grief that doesn’t seem possible – and Secret Stag and I are now in a very different position! We have made some incredible friends within the lifestyle and through these relationships I have gained a plethora of outlets to share my tales with. Along with the connections we have made, it has also meant that we have had far less time at home due to opportunities to catch up with our likeminded friends and so the blog, my initial confidant, has taken a back seat. Until now!

So where do I currently stand within the lifestyle? If I were to open that discussion on social media, most followers would declare that I’ve become a Queen of Spades—someone who has sexual encounters exclusively with black bulls. To a certain degree, there is some truth in this as most of my encounters since Covid have been with gentleman that fit this description. However, this wasn’t something I had actively sought out but as future blog posts will share, opportunities were presented to me that I couldn’t possibly have resisted including an invite to Splash Mocha, one of the premiere interracial hotwife conventions in the world.

The truth is that, from my own experience, the men who have approached Secret Stag and I in recent years have tended to fall into one of two camps. The first are those who seem to think they’d “make a great post for the blog” but show little genuine interest in me as a person and even less respect for my husband or his needs in our dynamic. The second are those who have taken the time to read our profiles on the various lifestyle apps, approach us thoughtfully and show genuine consideration for what both of us are looking for. They’re willing to invest the time and effort needed to build a connection rather than simply chase an encounter. It just so happens that the men who’ve fallen into that second category—and who also possess the charisma, confidence and physical presence that genuinely catch my eye (think Cavill or Elba)—have all been Black men.

It feels rather wonderful to be back where it all began.

Thank you to everyone who has continued to read, support and quietly follow along, even while the blog sat gathering dust. Your messages over the years have meant more than you probably realise, and it’s lovely to finally be back at my keyboard with so much to share.

So, where shall we begin?

Would you like the glamour and debauchery of transatlantic lifestyle events? The unforgettable nights in European sex clubs? Our first house-party escapades? Or perhaps you’d rather hear about the wonderfully intimate one-on-one encounters that so often turn out to be the most memorable.

Drop me a comment or send me a message and let me know which story you’d like to hear first. I can’t promise every tale will be as outrageous as a Star Trek-themed orgy… although I can’t promise they won’t be, either.

One thing I can promise is that I won’t be disappearing for another two years. I’ve accumulated far too many adventures to keep you waiting that long.